Sometimes silence speaks louder than the anguished cries of frustration and injustice. This afternoon, a group that gives a voice for fathers’ rights will take to the streets in downtown Edmonton with an non-vocal walk that its organizer hopes will say volumes about how fathers are often treated by the system after separation and divorce.
The Alberta chapter of Fathers Rights Canada is putting on the Fatherless Day silent walk as a way of quietly drawing attention to a heartbreaking situation that affects many men and their families.
“We’re talking about thousands of men,” said organizer Katherine Piché, guessing at the number of men who are being unfairly kept out of their children’s lives in this province alone.
“It is definitely encouraging people to come and express their feelings in a silent way. It is not a silent issue. It is something that needs to be seen.”
She became involved with the group because she came to understand the grief and pain suffered by some very close men in her life.
“My husband worked very hard to maintain a relationship with his son successfully. He’s still in his life but it was a struggle for many years. The lack of communication between parents … it was very frustrating,” she continued. “As for my brother, it’s an ongoing fight still to this day for five years now. It is excruciating to watch my brother be devalued as a father.”
“It’s heartbreaking.”
Fathers Rights Canada is a judgment-free support group for fathers. It is hosting this walk to encourage its followers and others to publicly and silently express their reactions to the unjust acts against fathers by their ex-partners and through government and other programs that respond to divorces especially when children are involved.
It is also open to all people who want to show their support.
“We do have a fair number of women supporters. We definitely offer support to everyone who’s suffering through this kind of ordeal.”
There is also an online organization called the Canadian Centre for Men and Families in Edmonton that takes emails from men in distress due to domestic abuse, family law troubles, and similar situations. The Equitable Child Maintenance and Access Society also works to promote equal parenting among divorced parents.
Paul Nathanson is a member of the Canadian Association for Equality who spent three decades at McGill University researching the historical and cultural contexts of manhood. He said that understanding the importance of men and their children will help to dispel the ignorance surrounding fatherhood and fathers’ roles in the family, as well as work to stop the separation and alienation of fathers even after divorces with the most troubling child custody battles.
“As I see it, this is primarily a matter of identity, not rights, although it involves rights, too, including the right of children to both mothers and fathers,” he said.
“I suggest that children need both mothers and fathers. Fathers are not assistant mothers. Children of single parents – whether due to choice, abandonment or death – are at far higher risk of just about every social and psychological problem. Consider the statistics on suicide, for instance, or dropping out of school.”
The walk will start at 2 p.m. today from Veterans Park at 10013 Bellamy Hill where it will proceed past the Edmonton Law Courts, the John E. Brownlee Building (where Maintenance Enforcement has its offices), City Hall, and Alberta Works before it concludes at Beaver Hill House Park at 10404 Jasper Ave. People can visit 'Fathers Rights Alberta Canada' on Facebook to find out more.
