Respect, kindness and empathy – three words that encompass my existence as an educator, parent, spouse and citizen. I am extremely proud of being a person who lives by these three words, regardless of what situations I have encountered in my life.
My letter addresses an ongoing problem that I see in amateur sports and some training facilities and the behaviours my children have experienced with the adults who coach/train them. I can talk about many positive aspects of Respect in Sport involving players, parents and coaches, but today I would like to address the lack of respect, kindness and empathy I have witnessed with certain coaches towards their players.
No, this is not a new phenomenon. This continued disrespect in sport is the reason parents and coaches are made to take Respect in Sport courses. So why is it that the organizations that require adults to take these courses, support individuals that are condescending, rude and verbally aggressive to the children who are registered in their sessions? Why do we support coaches who take pride in children quitting the sport they love or sessions they have registered in due to their aggressiveness, bullying and disrespectful behaviour? Why do we support individuals who verbally abuse and demean children in front of others? I hear many comments about the lack of respect, kindness and empathy these individuals have, but sport organizations and parents continue to support and register their children in these camps and programs.
I am also ashamed to be one of those parents who have registered my child in a program, specific hockey camp or brought them to a certain training facility. No more will my child come home upset and defeated because they are sworn at, or called names, or have had a hockey stick thrown on the ice due to their mistake. No more will my child feel helpless in standing up to these individuals because they are the “coach.” All children will succeed with nurturing and positive role models as I have seen with some of the wonderful individuals my children have been fortunate enough to be coached by. Our St. Albert sport programs must do a better job in vetting the people who are chosen to teach our children by listening to feedback from parents, students, community members and other coaches. It is time to hire and choose individuals who are respectful citizens and excellent role models for the athletes we are creating.
Being an educator for the past 23 years has shown me how children and adults thrive in nurturing, challenging and respectful environments. If I was to EVER to speak to a student of mine with extreme anger, inappropriate language and aggressiveness, I would not be employed and my incidents would be all over the news and social media. Yet, we continue to support these extreme individuals and sign up for their camps and training sessions. We continue to bring our children back year after year to these people who claim to “coach” our children.
In light of the various movements our society has had to organize to assist individuals to stand up to inappropriate behaviour, we need to start with educating our children that it is NOT right to support individuals who display a lack of respect, kindness and empathy over and over again.
I am angered by why we continue to support individuals that are loud-mouthed, rude, disrespectful and everything that destroys civility.
Maria Fiona, St. Albert
