Superheroes are dead

When I was a boy of about five years, I saw my first Superman movie and fell in love not only with the magic of movies but also the characterization of an entirely good being. What better way to inspire hope for the future than to show a hero with good humour, who smiles and laughs, and loves … and never hurts a hair on the head of any villain, even the bald ones.

I hate to say it but things have changed and not for the better. Superman now uses neither his intellect nor his ultimate empathy to solve problems without violence; he punches first and then flies away, letting the chips fall where they may. Of course, when Superman (Henry Cavill) punches, buildings topple and people die. He has now become villainous.

That is the primary reason for Batman’s (Ben Affleck) big beef with the man of steel. To humans, Superman is basically a god with limitless strength and ability, and no one to answer to for it. They say that with great power comes great responsibility. Well, it sure seems like this guy has oodles of the former with a severe lack of the latter.

For this reason, Superman is dead to me now (as are all other idealized comic book heroes of his ilk too), especially for the way that they are portrayed to the masses.

For one thing: violence begets violence. It doesn’t matter if it’s shown cinematically as a tool of the plot to magnify the conflict or alter the tone of the film. Depicting war naturally agitates the soul. It saddens and angers. While the character is an all-mighty entity, we in the audience are mere humans subject to undue influences and difficult to manage emotions.

This movie did nothing to inspire me, only instil a fear of ‘the alien’ in me under a barrage of mind-pounding noise and piercing flashes of light. I’ve said before that movies can inflict shellshock and it certainly was felt here. Superman and Batman are now in the same category as Transformers. Nothing about that is good.

Speaking of Batman, he doesn’t make sense. His entire conflict is about how Superman is like a god with all of his power and whatnot, causing wanton destruction yet never answering to anybody for it. Did anyone notice that Batman also has amazing strength and doesn’t answer to the law? So what does Batman do? He picks a fight with the super man, a fight that causes wanton destruction that no one is held accountable for. This is not only a crime in the real world, it’s a crime in screenwriting because it makes no sense within the movie.

Of course, he soon gives up his quarrel to start working with the Kryptonian like taking a 180-degree turn on the edge of a dime for no explicable reason. It doesn’t make sense from the very first second.

And while I’m at it, casting Ben Affleck as a plausible and likeable superhero is like casting a cardboard box with a face drawn on it to portray Henry V. I would wager that he would even fail to be a convincing cardboard box. He is an expressionless figure bereft of personality wandering around a film meant to spark thoughts of the meaning of heroes and gods. He looks like he got lost, found himself somehow on set and in costume, and just tried to mumble his way through his scenes in the hopes that no one would notice. After, he likely took off his costume and filled a rucksack with the leftovers from the catering trays, mumbling something about pickled carrots. Ben Affleck couldn’t act his way out of a wet paper bag. He is as sodden as a newspaper in a puddle. Bah, I say. If you’re creating an epic superhero movie with such monumental themes, why not cast someone who can emote?

This entire movie is disheartening. Not the concept, not the characters, not even the introduction of a female superhero – finally! – can alleviate this. Gal Gadot as Wonder Woman is a spurious and offensive entry too. Is this not 2016? Can’t women superheroes, ordinary women too, simply wear full-length pants when they go to work? This one can’t as the Amazonian warrior shows up to an intergalactic battle royale with a miniskirt and corset, and nice gold jewelry.

I think it’s now up to the women to write, direct and act in superhero movies that have real impact, real meaning, and real entertainment. I demand more stories that are absolutely nothing like this over-soaked melodrama with far too many sounds and furies on screen and absolutely no enlightenment or reflections on the human condition to show for it. If there were a rating that went below zero, this flick would bear it, as unnatural as that might be. Superman and Batman might as well cover their heads with capes in shame for the hell they hath wrought upon the hallowed halls of heroes.