Over the past few years, I have become very involved in the discussion of feminism and gender equality. Many feminists argue that to discuss the issues men face is to take away from the struggle of women, or is a result of internal misogyny – that by advocating for men, one is really trying to make herself more attractive. It was not until recently, however, that I noticed just how little we really speak to the issues men face. Issues that result in further perpetuating stereotypes of women.
In 2011, filmmaker Jennifer Siebel Newsom released a documentary called Miss Representation that analyzed the way media misrepresents women and girls. In her travels to promote this film, she was met with questions from parents: “What about our boys?” She went on to create the film I recently viewed entitled The Mask You Live In. This documentary analyzes the narrow definition of masculinity we have in North America and the harmful stereotypes this elicits.
Research shows that compared to girls, boys in the U.S. are more likely to be diagnosed with a behaviour disorder, prescribed stimulant medications, fail out of school, binge drink, commit a violent crime, and/or take their own lives. Young boys are two times more likely to flunk or drop out of school or receive special education and four times more likely to be expelled.
The film specifically focuses on the pressure boys face to fit our idea of masculinity – to be a pillar of strength, to be unemotional and to be a provider. As a result, boys are taught to channel anger over other emotions; that anger and strength are somehow synonymous. This increases levels of violence amongst boys, which is then perpetrated against women. Furthermore, because there is a pressure to be unemotional, boys are unable to communicate their struggles. Suicide is one of the top killers of boys and men on a global scale.
In teaching boys what it means to be masculine, we are perpetuating the idea that anything feminine is bad or wrong. No man fits the perfect mould of masculinity, just as no woman fits the mould of femininity. We are all far more complex then these simple, out-dated ideals. So, what can we do to change these damaging ideas?
First, we can expand the definition of masculinity and what it means to be a man. Newsom stated: “Masculinity can be about more than physical force, sexual conquest, and economic success. These stereotypes are hurting all of us.”
Second, let us as parents, mentors and community model a healthier form of masculinity. It’s up to us to give the next generation a positive representation of being a man that does not hinder their social-emotional growth.
And finally, we have to support boys in being their whole selves – help boys connect their hearts to their heads so they can find the courage and conviction to stay true to themselves.
But let me be clear. It’s not just about boys, not just about men, we’re all in this together. Hopefully, The Mask You Live In inspires each of us to take the challenge and help ourselves and the boys in our lives stay true to themselves and overcome limiting stereotypes.
Jennifer Hamilton is a local student and writer.
