If you watched the 1967 movie Bonnie And Clyde you may recall a novel sequence midway through. The homicidal couple and three accomplices kidnap a man and woman who have been chasing them to recover a stolen car. A surprisingly affable scene develops but ends abruptly – the atmosphere turns cold when the man discloses his profession. He is an undertaker. The stolen car brakes to a sudden stop and the undertaker and his lady friend are unceremoniously ejected.
Like the Barrow gang, many people have difficulty accepting that a few persons choose to routinely handle human remains and process them for final disposal. But this is a necessary endeavour for hygienic reasons, as well as to give effect to the prevalent human belief that the dead should be treated with dignity as a final salute to a life. It is important that what has to be done is done well, and honestly.
A recent Lethbridge news story underscores that not all funeral trade workers are up to the task. The owner of a mortuary there pled guilty to a count of fraud involving multiple separate incidents. The judge gave effect to his lawyer’s plea that the man be spared a criminal record so that he could go on running his business. The court of appeal took a sterner view and saddled the man with a conviction and a $5,000 fine (on top of the $5,000 charitable donation he had already made as part of his original sentence). In default of payment he will be lodged for 64 days in an entirely different sort of home.
News followers know that the chicanery found in this case – including purchased coffins not being cremated, and overcharging – has become uncomfortably frequent. The worst example I can think of for nefarious practices involved the 2004 death of famed broadcaster Alistair Cooke. A year later it was revealed that his bones had been surreptitiously removed by a tissue-recovery firm before cremation – plastic piping being substituted, and a certificate of death altered to conceal his extreme age and cancer to make the removed bones saleable. You do not get much scummier than that. The head guy got a sentence of 18 to 54 years imprisonment.
Around that time my family had a brush with funerary deception. A media story mentioned allegations concerning a Calgary funeral home, which happened to be the one that had handled my father’s funeral. The allegations included ashes not being properly scattered in accordance with family wishes – and payment. The time frame covered the period when the home had handled my father. We had asked that his ashes be scattered in the mountains west of Calgary and were assured this would be done. On checking, it turned out we had never received a certificate confirming this disposal had taken place. I made inquiries of a friend in the funeral trade and was directed to a government office looking into the matter.
They investigated and soon after reported that they were unable to determine what had happened to my father’s ashes. One problem was that in the eight or so years since his death, the funeral home’s ownership had changed several times. Records, and ashes, were a mess.
This sort of thing makes for uncomfortable, even distressing, feelings amongst survivors. The Lethbridge guy gets to re-apply for a funeral license in March 2014. If he does get it back, hopefully by then better governmental monitoring and regulation of the funeral profession will be in effect. It is sorely needed.
Writer David Haas is a long term St. Albert resident.
